Do you let people label you or do you label yourself

Forever people have been telling me that Im an all or nothing person.  They tell Im either on or either off, am good or bad, am flat out or doing nothing at all, am black or white etc etc, you get the gist.

Being told that Im an all or nothing woman starts just as a thought, now if repeated often enough this thought then becomes a belief, after a while this belief then starts getting actions that support it and then this moves into instilled habits that again ingrain this initial thought deep inside my subconscious.  So I know that everyone is allowed their own opinion and this is just their perception of me but I  started to think about this and wondered if this moniker everyone freely gave me was useful and if it was actually true.

Now looking back at my past experiences I could, in passing, agree with this saying but I have decided to switch this saying on its head and I now reply to people when they suggest this to me that Im just a woman who does everything to best of my abilities, or another way to look at it, is when I put my mind to it, I do it well, so very, very well.  

Looking at it this way gives me back the control over what I do and how I do it.  It makes me feel very much in charge and also gives me full ownership of what Ive done and what I do.  This also means that I fully accept that in the past I have been a very good cocaine addict, an excellent alcoholic and a very professional bulimic.  On the flip side I excel at taking care of myself, I am proud to be the owner of the most passionate drive and determination which enabled me to compete in the UKBFF British Bodybuilding finals (figure category) last year and I surprise myself continuously with my laser sharp focus which is slowly enabling me to build my Goddess Star Monroe empire.

So its all about how you see yourself, how you frame who you are.  Do you let people label you or do you label yourself? 

x

Curvy to Lean....

Life - if youre not careful it takes you away with it.  To stay on track and be aligned with your passions, goals and dreams take dedication, focus and determination.  Even Goddess's can lose their direction sometimes, can be confused at what they want, need and desire, can kid themselves that a stroll in the park and lifting a few weights in the gym counts as exercise and drinking a green smoothie in the morning and then snacking on chocolates counts as a nutritious eating program!!!  Thats me Im talking about, if you havent already guessed!!

Well I took stock and yes I do look adorable when Im curvy but I know deep down that Im not taking the best care of myself and Im all about doing the best I can each and every single day.   So my focus is switched on, my drive is back and my dedication to my "be the best" cause is back on.  2 weeks I started my own "Curvy to Lean" 12 week body transformation program.  I am documenting EVERYthing I do, from the time I get, the thoughts that run through my head, the exercise I do, the food that goes into my mouth, the feelings I feel, the energy I have or dont have, everything and I mean everything is being written down and you know why?????

Because of YOU, this is a program that I am developing for women, women who want to lose weight, tone up, get direction, have more energy, transform their body and just plain old feel good about themselves.  Its going to be a work of art, I know what you have to do to be in the best shape of your life, Im testing driving it for you, Im ironing out all the glitches and making the best program you will ever do!!  Im putting my heart and soul into this and it will look something like this....

12 weekly downloadable modules which include; a video each week explaining what you need for the week,  a detailed blueprint for the week, my journal notes so you can refer back time and time again to help you move along with the program, detailed exercise notes/photos and detailed nutritional advice.  A weekly teleseminar is included too and if you are in my vicinity a weekly bootcamp session is available run by my goodself - what more could a woman want!!!

Module one will be available for your free viewing pleasure this autumn with the whole program launching Spring 2011.   Watch out goddessas the Goddess has arrived!!!!!

Pilates Goddess

Ive been teaching pilates for over 11 years now.  Ive been in the fitness industry for over 20 and Pilates attracted me because of its clever and slick marketing ploy - promising you long sleek toned muscles using exotic and sexy looking equipment.  Wow, I was sold, sign me up to the next course and lets get going with achieving this fabulous body!!!  I did my training and then some more training and then some more, spent a fortune on kitting out my studio with the aforementioned exotic looking equipment and hey ho there I was one qualified pilates instructor.

I also loved pilates as I was always hot on technique with my PT clients and my group exercise classes, I couldnt understand why anyone would want to workout with crappy posture.  So it suited my mini hitleresque type teaching method keeping my clients in check whilst they dutifully performed all their  exercises.

If Im honest (and hey, Im always honest) Ive had a love/hate relationship with Pilates over the years, I have gone through a divorce, a drug addiction and various shitty relationships all of which I let impact my pilates business, but my clients stayed, they stuck with me and they obviously saw something in me that I didnt realize or even believe was there.  Throughout this time I was also looking for my long, sleek muscles, they never appeared (hell, how can they when I was in self destruct mode!!).

I have taught pilates in many different ways from the in depth intensive method to the generic go with the flow method and I have always got clients but not always got results.  But recently I met a wonderful woman, her name is Rebecca Leone and she is responsible for igniting my fire and inspiring me to new levels of Pilates wonderment that I only ever dreamt about.  She is my pilates mentor and I have had the opportunity of training with her for the past 2 years and had the pleasure of spending time in her amazing company in Las Vegas last December.  She has taught me the importance of spine health and that if we dont have great spine health, what do we have!! She has revolutionized my pilates teaching, I have a vision, a goal to empower and educate everyone that comes my way the importance of looking after their bodies from the inside out.

My teaching skills have transformed, I have transformed, my knowledge is amazing and I do consider myself a master Pilates instructor, in fact, my nickname is the Pilates Goddess.  This job is a challenge, it requires energy, compassion, intelligence and love on my part and when I mix all those ingredients up and stir in my eclectic client base the results are just pure magic.

I am transforming my clients lives through my pilates teachings, I am a straight talking Pilates Goddess, I deliver results, bodies that were once misaligned and in pain evolve into elegant, graceful beings.  I love the challenge of discovering how their bodies work, I have many theories of my own.  I believe that emotions not spoken get stored in the body, I believe that there is a whole mysterious connection between connective tissue and movement quality, I believe that when my clients put their mind to it they can achieve anything they damn well want to.

I believe in this method so much that I have taken on a apprentice, Goddessa Sarah London, she has also been trained with Ms Leone, so there is no longer just one of me, there are two and there is power in numbers.   I will mentor Sarah now to bring her up to my high standards of teaching and deliverance of excellent customer service.  We are ROCKING the world of Pilates, we are putting the FUN, the SPIRIT and the SEXINESS into PILATES, we are delivering the most outstanding classes and one to ones in the South east area, I have my eye on my own beautiful studio and this will come to me when I am ready.

And those long, sleek muscles, well they are here, as my attitude and approach changed so did the results.  My clients and I are looking great, we stand tall, walk with elegance, move with a sassy, sexy edge that only you can do when you have the confidence that your body is yours and you are in charge of it completely.  Pilates is here to stay and we are going make sure its FUN, SEXY and SPIRITED.

So its all here for the taking, why not drop a line and let me know how I can help you..........

www.goddessstarmonroe.com

I love my mummy

I think Im entering a confessional period of life right now, as I feel the need to speak about subjects that I never really talk about and one of those is my darling mummy.

I have had a love hate relationship with my mum for years, she annoys the hell out of me, always butting her nose into my business, telling me what to do, how to do, where to go to this etc etc etc.   I have never been close to my mum, always keeping her at arms length so she does get a chance to interfere.  She is opinionated, cutting and very judgemental.  But I do love her, she is my mum and she bought me up the best way she knew how.  I the eldest of 4 children and I paved the way for the rest of my siblings, I was the naughty one, the black sheep, the bad girl.

Over the years my mum has yelled at me, smacked my hands with a wooden spoon, banished me to my bedroom, had me quaking in my shoes by just her look, she has dragged me out of nightclubs by my hair, she has interrogated me in front of my friends, she has shouted at me in public, she has laid the guilt trips on me and she has sided with my boyfriends rather than me.

She has also been there to cuddle me, to hold me, to tell me that everything is ok, that I can do anything I want, that she loves me, she believes me, that Im strong, Im an amazing woman, I have seen that look of admiration in her eyes, I hear the strong words of encouragement she drilled into me when I was young, she has high values, morals and ethics that she believes in and she has dedicated her life to bringing up myself and my siblings.

My mum is quite a woman.  She is strong, she is capable, she is clever and she cares.  She has my utmost respect and I hold her in very high regard and I love her very very much x

Sneaky Addictions

I met a lovely girl in Starbucks this morning and she confessed to me that she was "addicted" to coffee.  She looked forward to walking to Starbucks every morning to get her daily fix, even though it was out of her way from home and work.  After a brief natter (as I also had to get my coffee!!) I discovered that she loved the whole scenario about getting her coffee, she loved the atmosphere in the shop, she loved sitting down outside and drinking her coffee, she viewed it as a treat, a pick up, something just for her that she could enjoy day after day after day.

Now this post could go off and start talking about Starbucks and how absolutely brilliant they are in enticing people into their world but Im not!  Im going to tell you about me and addictions.  We use addictions as a way of not accepting and acknowledging the truth of who we really are and no one knows it better than me!!  I am the queen of addictions, hey even the goddess of addictions I have had numerous obsessions and addictions since I was a little girl and I thought I would share mine and my analysis of each one.  I think trying to get rid of an addiction without replacing with another healthier addiction is doomed for failure, so remember that when looking at yours.

Me age 10 - 16      
Religiously touched everything 3 x before I could leave the room or house.
I was totally shy, totally insecure and used this as a form of reassurance that nothing bad would happen to me.

Me age 13 - 16
Stopped eating food in the day, I would only every eat 1 x chicken pie covered in tomato sauce in the evening
Control issues, I felt out of control, didnt like myself, one way of keeping myself in check.

Me age 17 - 19
Men
Needed to feel loved, be loved

Me age 23 - 26
Bulimic
Control issues again, didnt like my body, didnt like myself, wasnt good enough

Me age 30 - 37
Addicted to cocaine and alcohol
Completely unhappy, wanted to shut off from my world and not feel anything

Me age 31 - 37
Shopping
An escape, freedom, another control issue.  Spending money gave me a feeling of control (even though I was completely out of control)

Me 37 to now
Walking
Time out every day to clear my head and reset my batteries for my day ahead
Training in the gym
Clever me time, where I am nourishing and building my body to the best it can be
Baking and eating cakes - weekends only x
My nurturing side coming out again, allowing myself to be indulgent and enjoy doing so
Spending time with good friends
Its all about the love baby, love, love, love.
Reading, researching, learning
All about expanding me as a person, again to be the best I can be.


So as you can see Ive had a fair few addictions.  Ive also turned my life around without the help of therapists or counsellors and I am creating a new life full of wonderfully, beautiful addictions.  Addictions that will help me grow, help me love and adore who I really am.

Honey Goddess Star Monroe is HOME, BABY, HOME xxxxx





            

Bringing SEXY back!!!

I must admit I may have to thank the adorable Justin Timberlake for the title but the rest is all about us sexy women!

Sexy is a state of mind, its a sass, its the way you walk, the way you talk, its about  confidence, its about self belief and its about one kick arse rocking attitude!

Hey if you dont feel confident, fake it till you make it.  Check yourself out in the mirror, look and I mean really look at yourself, acknowledge and own who that women is in the reflection, give her the thumbs up and tell her that she is the most goddamn sexiest woman in the world,  she is the hottest woman to walk the planet and hey today is going to be your day baby!!! Its all about you!!!

Dress your body in clothes that you feel great in, do your hair, put your makeup, make an effect because (in the words of that famous advert) you are SO worth it!!!

A real woman is.........

1. Independent
2. Busy in her own business ie job, hobbies, interests
3. She doesnt meddle in other peoples affairs
4. She has great compassion
5. She knows that a man needs space and needs to sort out his own problems in his own time
6. She is well dressed and groomed
7. She is calm and relaxed and takes time out every day for herself
8. When she has money she spends it and when she doesnt, shes not worried
9. She knows her worth - she is priceless!
10. She has a certain elegance about herself
11. She is self confident and is not afraid of making mistakes.
12. She surrounds herself with inspiring friends and media.
13. Adores her family with a passion.

Interesting eh???  How many traits do you see in yourself?  Do you agree, disagree?  Let me know your thoughts xx

My principles to follow for change.

Having just returned from the most amazing and immense training course I have experience for a very long time my head is swimming.  Swimming with thoughts and ideas.  If Im honest Im very excited I know that this is going to bring enormous change to my business and what I can offer to all my lovely clients.  Im a little scared too, change is change and I as much as the next person likes to stay in my comfort zone but I know for me to expand and evolve I need to walk through my comfort zone, feel the discomfort and get on with all the changes I need to make.  So thats where I am right now, I am committed to taking baby steps, going gently and smoothly, being consistent in my action plan to go where I desire to be.  

Whenever I am faced with enormous change there are steps that I always tend to take....

1. Take a breath, step back from it all and look at the big picture
2. Become clear on what, how and why I want what I want
3. Talk to my good friends about my ideas, let them see how they sound when I verbalise them
4. Categorize, ie separate work, home, body, mind
5. Work out the goals/passions for each one - starting at the ultimate goal
6. Work backwards from this goal, chunking down the goal into smaller bite sized pieces
7. Write up my goals, assess them, are they realistic, are they exciting, do I feel passionate about them?
8. Work every day towards achieving my goals, be gentle but firm with myself, Rome wasnt built in a
day, but it was built.
9. Realize that extraordinary results needs extraordinary effect.
10.Keep the faith, believe that I am worth this and keep my focus on the end result.

Feel free to use my change principles for anything you are trying to achieve.  Let me know how you get on, and Im here if you need any further advice or just fancy a chat xx

What do you do to look after yourself?

I was teaching a couple of days ago and my client looked me straight in the eye and said.... "I love my lessons here, this is my time, this is time for me, its time out from my busy life and it just makes me happy,", she also asked me what I do that is just for me.

2 years I radically changed my life and for many years before this point I can honestly say that I was taking no real care of myself at all, I was in self destruct mode and I kinda liked it there.  As I transitioned out of this phase I set in place 3 daily rituals that I know I could do everyday, that was 1. to get up 2. walk the dog 3. have one green juice.  These were simple self care rituals that I continued to do daily and they in turn helped me instill some great self care habits.  So fast forwarding to today I thought I would share how I take care of myself on a weekly basis.

Every day I wake up early, I walk the dog, talk to my friend, go to the gym.  I take time to prepare my breakfast and lunch.  I try to write nearly every morning, I go to the hairdressers a couple of times a week to have my hair blowdryed, once a month I have a manicure and pedicure.  Every night I body brush my skin, I run a long bubbly bath and I sit in it and relax.  I read something inspirational every day.  I express my gratitude and appreciation every day and I remind myself what an absolutely beautiful, lovely woman I am every single day.

These are my rituals, these are what makes me the woman I am today.  These rituals support and help me, they guide me to being the best I can be, they inspire me and they help me grow and evolve all the time.   There is no doubt I am one wild, free spirited woman, who hates rules, regulations and being told what to do!  I understand that I could easily not look after myself and throw caution to the wind and say f*** it but I dont, I know where that would take me and Im all about looking after myself and being the best I can be, because when I am being the best I can be, then I can inspire and encourage others to be the best they can be xxxxxx

Beautiful creatures.... You are unique, there is only one of you! Focus on what you love about yourself and forget about what you don't! When you honor your inner and outer beauty your womanly powers will explode!! X