Sneaky Addictions

I met a lovely girl in Starbucks this morning and she confessed to me that she was "addicted" to coffee.  She looked forward to walking to Starbucks every morning to get her daily fix, even though it was out of her way from home and work.  After a brief natter (as I also had to get my coffee!!) I discovered that she loved the whole scenario about getting her coffee, she loved the atmosphere in the shop, she loved sitting down outside and drinking her coffee, she viewed it as a treat, a pick up, something just for her that she could enjoy day after day after day.

Now this post could go off and start talking about Starbucks and how absolutely brilliant they are in enticing people into their world but Im not!  Im going to tell you about me and addictions.  We use addictions as a way of not accepting and acknowledging the truth of who we really are and no one knows it better than me!!  I am the queen of addictions, hey even the goddess of addictions I have had numerous obsessions and addictions since I was a little girl and I thought I would share mine and my analysis of each one.  I think trying to get rid of an addiction without replacing with another healthier addiction is doomed for failure, so remember that when looking at yours.

Me age 10 - 16      
Religiously touched everything 3 x before I could leave the room or house.
I was totally shy, totally insecure and used this as a form of reassurance that nothing bad would happen to me.

Me age 13 - 16
Stopped eating food in the day, I would only every eat 1 x chicken pie covered in tomato sauce in the evening
Control issues, I felt out of control, didnt like myself, one way of keeping myself in check.

Me age 17 - 19
Men
Needed to feel loved, be loved

Me age 23 - 26
Bulimic
Control issues again, didnt like my body, didnt like myself, wasnt good enough

Me age 30 - 37
Addicted to cocaine and alcohol
Completely unhappy, wanted to shut off from my world and not feel anything

Me age 31 - 37
Shopping
An escape, freedom, another control issue.  Spending money gave me a feeling of control (even though I was completely out of control)

Me 37 to now
Walking
Time out every day to clear my head and reset my batteries for my day ahead
Training in the gym
Clever me time, where I am nourishing and building my body to the best it can be
Baking and eating cakes - weekends only x
My nurturing side coming out again, allowing myself to be indulgent and enjoy doing so
Spending time with good friends
Its all about the love baby, love, love, love.
Reading, researching, learning
All about expanding me as a person, again to be the best I can be.


So as you can see Ive had a fair few addictions.  Ive also turned my life around without the help of therapists or counsellors and I am creating a new life full of wonderfully, beautiful addictions.  Addictions that will help me grow, help me love and adore who I really am.

Honey Goddess Star Monroe is HOME, BABY, HOME xxxxx